Thoughts on a Napkin

Big Mo

2010-11-13T17:49:00.001-08:00

Happy Movember!

http://artofmanliness.com/2010/10/22/fight-prostate-cancer-by-growing-a-mustache-the-2010-movember-contest/

Updates

2009-09-14T19:37:00.000-07:00

Here is our young padawan

who is now a Jedi.

Jesse is such a delight, a very keen and thoughtful girl.

Here is a study in light, by our young artist, dancer.

Rosemary Jane

2009-09-14T18:35:00.001-07:00

Rosemary Jane Harper was born at 2:27 on 9/12/09,

Weighing 7lbs 13oz and 20in long.

Korrie called me in from work on Sat. morning, not really wanting to deal with the kids. We knew the time was close, and she had had some early pre-labor contractions that week and again some that morning. Noelle, the new midwife working with Nancy (midwife for our other three) had checked Korrie and she was at a 3 and predicted a weekend birth. So. . .i came home. actually, i

was elated for any excuse whatsoever not to work, especially on a Saturday, but i digress, me and my job is another matter. After i got home, i tended to kids, got things ready, made up our overnight bag, dressed the kids, fixed car seats, on and on, while Korrie worked on finishing up some things for her grant job. Yes folks, she was hurriedly working on the computer while working through contractions, this went on for a couple of hours; "just a couple more things i need to email, just a couple more things i need to look at, i'm almost done." So around 11:30 we left for the hospital after a good walk to the mailbox to make sure things were progressing. . . nothing like getting to the hospital to find out you are only a 5. we're shooting for 8's here people! so we get there, wait in the lounge for a room to be mopped, get the room, fill out paperwork, and finally get checked. . . . . . . . a 6. (and Korrie asks, "is it a 5-6 or a 6-7?" nurse answers, "a good 6-7." Korrie smiles. not an 8, but pretty good)

We are wanting to get to the tub as soon as possible, Korrie relaxes really well in the tub, and Clementine was born in the tub, so we were hoping for a possible repeat. Now it is about 1:30 and neither Nancy nor Noelle are there. The nurse leave the room, and i say to Korrie as i run water for the tub we probably weren't going to get to use, wouldn't it be something if i delivered the baby while the nurses were out, and when they came in i just said, "hey, could you get me a clamp and some scissors?" (Korrie makes very little noise when giving birth, if you recall.)

Soon the nurses come back with a doctor, just in case and we get checked, now at an 8, i estimate about half an hour -- trying to buy some tub time -- and the doctor chuckles and says 10 minutes. Just after they leave, Korrie says she feels like pushing, i look at the nurse and say she's not joking, Nancy comes storming in wearing jean shorts and sandals, and checks to see if the tub is full! But, alas, the nurse shuts us down. Nancy dons the gown and gloves, takes charge of the room, chases off the guy from the lab who wants to draw blood?! and we get down to business. No big details to tell, a couple minor position adjustments, some deep breathing, a good push, readjust, shift, another good push - she's almost out, Nancy coaches, breathe, wait, now push, wait, relax, now push, the head is out, Nancy looks at me and i reach over and grab Rosemary to finish delivering her and . . . to my utter delight . . . Korrie throws back her head and gives a fierce WARRIOR YELL!!!!!!!

i was so proud. she came, she conquered. she's my hero.

ABCD

2008-07-20T19:55:00.000-07:00

i have some video but i just can't seem to get it to upload. anyway, i just wanted to brag on my son, who at 19 months old learned his abc's. now, i don't mean he just knows the song, which he does, he actually knows the letters. we have these foam letters that Jesse was playing with, and he picked up the "O" and i told him the name and he ran in circles saying loudly "O, O, O, O. . ." then, in a couple days he was picking up letters and holding them out to get the names, by the end of the week we were working on the difference between F and E , K and X , M and W,
O and Q and now a mere month later, he is a super hit at parties. i came home from work this week and he had learned his numbers (sans "4") up to ten. and to top it off, just yesterday he grabbed my finger to pull me out of my chair and said, "daddy, show you" walked me over to the blocks where he lined up several and said, "look daddy, i did it!"

5 YEARS

2008-06-08T10:11:00.000-07:00

Five years ago today, Korrie and i made our vows. A master's degree, three jobs, thirteen months unemployed, twenty seven months pregnant, three kids (approx. 3000 diapers), and 30lbs later i'm in awe of the Lord's goodness. He brought Korrie and i together and He has blessed us in so many ways, even when there's been more worse than better. i'm still amazed that this fiesty woman is by my side, in my life and in my heart.

CLEMENTINE

2008-05-06T13:30:00.000-07:00

Welcome Clementine Elizabeth Harper!!

She arrived at 1:30pm Friday, May 2nd.

8lbs 1oz, 20 3/4 inches long.

Korrie woke me up around quarter to six to say, "today's the day." So we mustered the troops, readied the house and loaded the van by around 9 and, ironically enough, stopped by our auto mechanic's shop to see if he could fix our dash panel! He said it might take a little bit and i said,"how long is that? my wife's in labor in the van." He laughed and then looked shocked. We rescheduled, then headed into Nicholasville and got some gas and paid the water bill. We got to Nancy's (our Nurse Midwife) office to get checked at around 10am. Korrie was at a 5, so we walked the parking lot for a couple hours, while my parents headed our way with some breakfast.

At quarter to 12 we were at a 6 and we went over to the hospital. Nancy reserved a room with a tub for us, so after several long minutes of being strapped up to monitors and answering questions and signing here and here and bailing hot water from the sink into the tub, at 12:30-ish Korrie was able to relax in the tub and work through contractions without distractions. Everyone finally left, I turned out the lights in the bathroom and let her do her thing. (i'll do another post called "Korrie in labor") At about 1:15, i went in to check on her, knelt down and held her hand. She worked through a contraction. With the next contraction, she furrowed her brow, breathed heavily several times, then grunted. She said she felt like pushing. I offered to get Nancy, she said wait. . .i waited, she grunted again, i went into the hall, spotted Nancy and waggled my finger for her to follow (the less you say the better off you are in these situations). When we got back to the bathroom, i knelt, the light was turned on and Nancy went wide-eyed. She put on some gloves and half-jokingly said, "we're going to have this baby in the tub!" Korrie took this as a green-light, she grunted again. Korrie offered to get out of the tub, Nancy considered and decided to see one more contraction. With that contraction the baby was mostly out. With another couple pushes Clementine was on Korrie's chest in the tub. Seeing as how it's not exactly legal to birth in the tub at St. Joe East, and none of us had done this before, i took Clementine and the midwives helped Korrie to the bed. We were instantly famous throughout the hospital. And then serenity came to a halt and it was grand-central-station once more. Every new nurse that came in was talking about the water-baby. Here do this, lets go here or there, we need to take the baby over here. So, while Korrie was finishing up, I was playing protector/defender (imagine me checking nurses into the glass on an ice rink--almost). We are so thankful to all of you who pray for us and to have another wonderful birth and a beautiful little girl.

Glimpses from August '07 to April '08 (!!)

2008-04-27T19:10:00.001-07:00

The Passing of Bernadette

2008-04-26T21:23:00.000-07:00

Korrie here...Well, the deed has finally been done! After months of talking about mailing Jesse's precious addiction, Bernadette the pacifier, to France and my friend Shalimar, action took place on the 21rst! I think the anticipation of the event was just as dreadful to me as a parent (thus the delay) as it was to Jesse. Even so, Jesse helped paint a box for the package, and marched bravely into the post office with me to mail it off. The postal worker congratulated her, and when we got back outside to Lee waiting in the car, Jesse ran up to the window to yell, "Daddy, I did it!!" Needless to say, the glee felt then wore off rather quickly that night, and I was up with her, oh, about 3 or 4 times to comfort her and try to get her mind off of the missing friend. We prayed about it a lot, the occasional wild angry thrashing stopped (pretty scary, folks), and sleep came. Since then Jesse has only cried for it a couple of times, and continues to be proud of herself and her truly attained "big girl" status. I am very glad this chapter is over, but there's a small part of me sad to see it go, sad that it means Jesse really is bigger, and time is ever passing. Here's to Bernadette: may she live a full life in France, eating crepes with chocolate and sipping cafe au lait with Shalimar! :-)

Now, what about Zeke's thumb...

BACK

2008-04-19T17:35:00.000-07:00

Hello again everyone. . . anyone?
we're still here, and we have internet at the house now, so to celebrate i'm updating the blog.
i'm a bit out of practice and behind the times, but i'm glad to see your blogs again finally.
Korrie and Jesse are having a sleepover at MaryGene's house, so it's just me and Zeke tonight, and he's off in la la land now, so here i sit. No big news as of late, Korrie has a couple weeks to go yet, but she's at the point where sooner would be better than later. Zeke is a nemo nut, worse than Jesse ever was with babe. Jesse still has bernadette, we're just chicken i guess to get rid of it, but it has to happen soon. it's one of those things where no time seems like a good time. she thanked Jesus for it the other night at bedtime prayers. still ironing out names for the little one to come, Clementine will be one, either first or middle, we're not sure yet. i for one am so glad it's finally warming up, and drying up; cold and wet isn't a happy thought for anyone, but it's doubly tough on delivery work.
holding down the wilmore fort. more to come.

Taming the Terrible Two's

2007-08-05T19:27:00.001-07:00

One thing many of us parents of toddlers are dealing with is how best to discipline. Whew, what an undertaking!! It seems the best way is a mix of things, based on the brevity and pre-meditation of the young offender's offense. We started off with the hand thump for Jesse, and have since moved on to the naughty chair and the occasional spanking. I had, however, an opportunity to resort to another way the other week, and it left an impression on our little woman. Our land lord has a batch of beagle pups up the drive near the barn, and we visit them almost daily. Well, Jesse has been learning gentleness, but needless to say, the excitment of squirming pups got to her, and she dropped one on it's back, sending it yelping to the mommy dog. I had been telling Jesse to listen and be gentle, so in reaction to her roughness I gave her hand a quick smack. Then, for the next week (at least) every time we saw the puppies Jesse would talk about the incident, sounding something like: "we see the puppies, I didn't listen, momma spanked my hand..." I'm sure even now if you asked her about it you'd hear the story recited with gusto. Oh yeah, she is much better with the beagles.

So, after you readers enjoy these pics of a trip to see with pups with our friends TL and Marygene, send a comment on how you are taming (or attempting to tame) your little ones - Godly wisdom, passed along blog-stlye.

Summertime...

2007-07-25T20:27:00.000-07:00

We took a week-long vacation at the end of June with all of my (Korrie) family. It was a great time, and here are some pics to prove it...

BLUEFISH, REDFISH

2007-06-10T17:39:00.000-07:00

This is the story of Bluefish and Redfish. About a week before Easter our beta fish of approx. a year, named Bluefish, died. Korrie called me from work one Friday morning and told me to check the tank and see if Bluefish was alive. I did, he wasn't. Jesse came running in the living room and i asked myself what one of those cool, wise dad's from novels and movies that you wish you could be like would do in this situation. i hadn't a clue. So i brought Jesse over to the tank and showed her that Bluefish had died. We scooped him out together, then took him to the garden and buried him. Then we loaded up and went to the pet store to look for another beta. This time we got a red one, so as not to be confused with Bluefish, and appropriately she called him Redfish. When we got home later, she kept telling us to look at Redfish, Bluefish died. Then for about a week (and sometimes even still) she'd say out of nowhere-and especieally to guests- Bluefish died, now we have Redfish. When Easter Sunday came, i was a bit out of sorts and disappointed that we hadn't done more to explain why that day was so important and talk with her about Jesus, so i found our little kid's bible stories book and looked for the Easter story. not much there really for a kid's story. then i tried to explain, Jesus died and then God made him alive. Well she picked it up right away, Jesus Died! she said it over and over, and told Korrie several times. it took a bit longer to explain that now he was alive. when she first got it, she shouted, "Jesus Died!" and then got a grin on her face and leaned forward and whispered, "Now He's Alive!"

Where to go, when you need to go

2007-06-09T10:42:00.002-07:00

The last few days have been full of excitment and trepidation. Buying diapers is so nearly a thing of the past. Zeke has been in cloth diapers for a couple months now and we're loving it. Jesse has just recently begun to go on the potty. She's great with #1 and has even gotten out of bed in the evening to go. #2 has been a difficult adjustment however. she did go once on her little seat, but not without fear and trembling and a few tears, though they were quickly replaced with joy and dancing at the group march to the commode for the ceremonial flush and the ensuing M&Ms. She didn't even try to go again for three days! When she did, she started in her diaper and we got her to the pot, but she refused to go, screaming and crying and shaking her head. so we put the diaper on again and went for a walk. when we came back, i was pushing her on the swing i built for her and she wanted down. she turned around and i bent down to give her a hug. as she squeezed my neck she began shaking and grunting. she then looked proudly over my shoulder at Korrie and announced "i pooping mommy!"
We've upped the ante to 5 m&m's for at least a try on the pot, we'll see where that gets us.

Four Years (and counting)

2007-06-09T09:51:00.001-07:00

This is Korrie writing. Lee hasn't blogged in a while, and I hope it wasn't a passing fancy. Yesterday was our Four Year Anniversary - an event very deserving of capitals. It really is true that love grows; what I feel and think about Lee now is stronger and deeper than that June day four years ago. He continues to impress me, and occasionly butterflies happily whirl in my stomach on account of something he does. Ahhh...! As for how we celebrated, after my half day at the seminary and Lee's time at Subway we left the kiddos with my gracious mom-in-law (aka Nana) and took off for Nich-vegas. First stop, the new theater in town to see Ocean's 13. Very entertaining. The $5 Popcorn hit the spot, and the small coke was worth every penny of the $3.75. Next time I've got to smuggle in some mm's. Maybe I shouldn't admit that on a blog... Anyway, after the flick we ate at Sonny's BBQ. Man, the rib sampler was fantastic! It felt weird though, sitting in a humongous (sp?) booth, drinking out of enormous glasses, looking at the generally large population surrounding us, and then ordering lots of meat. It was one of those distinctly american moments. At any rate, the banana pudding was homemade and I recommend it as well. We returned home in time to quell Zeke and give Jesse her balloon (aka boon) - couldn't ask for much more in a date. And I certainly couldn't ask for more in a husband!

Bring on the Lard

2007-03-15T19:22:00.000-07:00

the latest development to galvanize my dream of a sustainable farm is the discovery of the Weston A. Price foundation website. Dr. Price was a dentist in the early 19th century that decided to study native/indigenous people groups to understand why their cranial and facial development was superior, resulting in stronger, healthier, straighter teeth, naturally. He discovered that ALL of these groups consumed large amounts of Saturated Fats, that is animal fats. They also understood the benefits of raw milk and the consumption of vitamins A and D in the form of liver oil. Of these groups, those that had recently started consuming "western" diets of processed foods, their facial and dental structures suffered along with their overall health within as little as one generation.
The website is filled with studies that are largely overlooked by modern medicine and dentistry, as well as commentaries on the relationship between farming, health, the econcomy, big business, and how we got to where we are. The idea that our health is directly related to nutrition, not the "pyramid" of genetically engineered, extruded grains; hormone/antibiotic riddled meat; irradiated and "preserved" fruits and vegetables; and skim-milk (which used to be exclusively for the pigs) that has been ultrapasteurized and homogenized, has somehow been lost on the modern West. And that's just the food at the supermarket, to say nothing of the methods of growing and raising these foods, and the efforts of government agencies to support the degeneration of our food and land in the name of "health".
Needless to say, we've all added cod liver oil to our diets now and we're drinking non-homogenized milk, at least until we can find a raw milk provider, or get a jersey of our own. we are buying grass-fed, grass-finished beef, using lots of real butter, and thankfully going back to lard for cooking.
We are also spending a lot more money on food, which for me is a very difficult. But i've thought long and hard along these lines and if an ounce of prevention equals a pound of lard and a spoonful of cod liver oil, then i'm okay not spending all my money (in deductibles) on the "cures".

My Son

2007-02-13T18:01:00.000-08:00

The other day i was driving to work, thinking about being away from my kids, wondering what they were doing while i was gone. my mind drifted to thoughts about being a father. sometimes reality hits you when you're unaware. things dawn on you, things you already knew, thought about, realized; you just realize them anew. being the father of a daughter is something i'm getting used to, learning about and enjoying. being father to a son is still freaking me out. he's wonderful, happy, smiley, talkative and strong. Ezekiel means "God strengthens" or "Whom God makes strong."
there are times when i am paralyzed by all the mistakes i could make, but most of the time i'm just in awe, thankful and excited about raising a boy and helping him become a man.
i feel an even closer kinship with my own father. i want to honor him and the way he raised me, helped me become a man. i pray, not enough, but i pray that the Lord makes me a good father, gives me wisdom and patience in raising my kids. it's too early to talk about the differences in raising a girl and a boy, but it feels different; scares me in different ways, makes me happy in different ways.

a dream

2007-02-01T19:57:00.000-08:00

My dream is a simple one. my dream is to be simple, to live a simple life, to do simple things. i want to farm. that is, i want to live on a farm, raise my kids on a farm, go to work out my back door, eat all my meals at home, actually see the fruit of my labor, and do something i believe in. i've been researching sustainable farming and homesteading for about four years now. i've also followed land prices over that time. i designed a dream home and two barns, laid out the farm paddocks, looked into windmill well pumps, ponds, alternative energy sources, woodstoves, direct marketing livestock and anything else i could think of. so here's a peak at my dream:

i see a hand-hewn log home with a large family room, large kitchen and a dining room table that seats 12 so there's always room for friends and family. there's a small barn with equipment shed and a larger livestock barn to keep the Belgian draft horses and for milking the goats. there's a small orchard with apples and pears, a grape arbor, strawberry and blackberry patches and a half-acre garden for fresh veggies. there's one hill-side that's covered in wild flowers for Jesse.
Some Highland Cattle are grazing in the field beside a stand of trees. To me, Highlands are the perfect combination of smarts, looks, size and hardiness. they're a very gentle, long-haired breed of cattle from the rugged highlands of Scotland. they are considered a heritage breed since they haven't changed or been "improved" like the commercial breeds. their hair provides a layer of warmth and protection, thus they don't carry the extra layer of fat and suffer less from diseases and parasites that plague many commercial breeds. they are also excellent mothers and calf easily.

in the pasture nearby are a few sheep. there are two breeds i'm thinking about. the first is the Scottish Blackface, which are also a hardy breed from Scotland. they are "hair" sheep and their wool is popular with fiber artists, rug makers and the finest grades go into the famous Harris tweeds.
the other contender for sheep breed is the Dorset. they are a dual-purpose breed, good for both wool and meat.
both breeds have some appeal , though the Dorset is much more popular and thus, available.

in a pen beside the livestock barn there are a few goats frollicking. the Nigerian Dwarf goat is a smaller breed of milk goat that many people keep as pets. they are cute, fun and great milkers for their size. i hope that we can make cheese and soap from goats milk.

i also see a couple of Tamworth hogs rooting around, preparing the garden, cleaning up brush for new pasture and making everyone laugh. they are touted as the best homestead pig for their easy going nature, their lean meat and their personality. they're also a heritage breed that hasn't been affected by commercialization.

Of course we can't forget the chickens!! Barred Rocks are prodigious brown egg layers. they have long been a favorite of farmers. i like their look and hope to have plenty of eggs to sell. i also want to try raising broilers on pasture in "chicken tractors." i've done quite a bit of research on pastured poultry and the health benefits as well as quality and taste of the meat appear very impressive.

i think about the farm everyday, and every day i have to go to work for someone else is motivation to work even harder to realize my dream. Someday i will walk out my back door, collect eggs, move chickens, hitch up the Belgians to mow hay, spend the afternoon repairing fence, piddle in the barn, and eat food i raised and grew for dinner.

My Best Friend, My Love

2007-01-17T18:33:00.000-08:00

i met Korrie eleven years ago. she was just starting college, a beautiful young girl excited about life. i was the disillusioned recent graduate.

thinking back about those times, i realize i how easy it was to talk to her. she was, and still is, full of wonder and questions, eager to listen to my stories, to sit for hours over coffee, talk and laugh.

it wasn't until six years later, after i'd left kentucky for the west and things unkown, traveled to asia and great britain, hiked the AT and hitch-hiked from colorado to virginia, that i moved back to kentucky and found myself sitting with Korrie in my butternut yellow trailer, drinking coffee and smoking hand-rolled cigarettes. we ended up talking about what we wanted out of life. i saw her again, for the first time, with new eyes and a new heart.

on february 13th we started "dating" -- on april 5th we were engaged. it was an intense five weeks. our six-year friendship was a fertile soil for our love to grow; our conversations were serious, deep, soul-searching and soul-revealing. i remember one particular conversation we had at TGI-Friday's. Korrie said she had something to tell me, but she was afraid it would push me away. i instantly reacted from a past hurt and said she should tell me everything. my mind raced and raced, trying to forsee what possible, terrible thing she could say. she delayed and my mind raced as i searched her face, her eyes, for what she was going to say. suddenly i knew. i told her i knew. i knew what she was going to say. she didn't believe me, so i asked if she wanted me to say it first. she responded with a defiant air, "go ahead." i simply said, "i love you too."

we were engaged for 14th months, and on a fine sunny day in June, with the ever-present threat of rain, we were married. outside. barefoot. it was the happiest and scariest day of my life, embarking on this new journey into the unkown, with my best friend, my love.

four years and two kids later, we're still discovering ourselves and each other. our friendship continues to deepen, our love continues to grow.

Jesse is Two!

2007-01-16T14:46:00.000-08:00

We celebrated in simple fashion at Jesse's second birthday party on Jan. 12th. The only invitees to attend were the Rapach's. Abby and Jesse had a blast together as usual and both enjoyed their turn at the "mine" game.

in two short/long years we've become pros at the diaper table and i consider myself an expert at "doing things with one hand while holding the baby." we've seen our patience grow, our nerves fray, our resolve strengthen and our hair gray. we've also fallen in love a thousand times with our daughter. everyday an adventure, everyday a trial.

years ago, as i imagined the family i might one day have and knowing i wanted a lot of kids, i always pictured myself having a boy first (ideally to alternate boy/girl). when we went to that fateful doctor's visit for the ultrasound, i just knew in my heart we were having a boy. even when i saw the images on the monitor, i just knew i saw male parts. but then she exclaimed, "it's a girl!" i did a double-take, and asked if she was sure. She, of course, replied she had a 100% track-record at reading ultrasounds, yet i was unconvinced. i prayed and wrestled with God for about a week. "a girl?" "a girl first?" i told myself it was for Korrie. i told myself it was so she could help with the other kids. God knew it was for me. . .now i know it was for me. God also refused to answer my prayers for a job, so i stayed at home. for a year and a half i was a Stay at Home Dad with Jesse. it was tough, in more ways than one, but it gave me a bond with Jesse i might not otherwise have had, and that i cherish. she is a beautiful, wonderful girl; a daughter of the Most High, and i get the privilege of being her Daddy.

At Home

2007-01-15T20:34:00.000-08:00

Life as three has now been replaced with life as four. Korrie had another wonderful pregnancy and another phenomenal birth experience. We got to the hospital around 9am on Oct. 23 and Zeke was born at 12:55. Korrie once again did it all without even a hep-loc. We are both very thankful for a healthy boy and a natural birth experience.

The Lord is pushing us in new ways as we discover ourselves through our kids. The way memories flood my mind as i see Jesse play and try to talk and describe her world, her thoughts, her needs and wants is overwhelming. Looking at Zeke and seeing my childhood again, i stare in wonder as i reflect on the roads i've taken, the obstacles i've encountered, who i've been, who i've become, and what the future holds for us. The things i once thought i wanted have slowly and suddenly changed into what i find myself day-dreaming of today. Wanderlust no longer grips my mind; instead i dream of long summer days on the farmstead, playing with my kids in the hay in our barn, moving the animals from pen to field, gathering eggs and tending the garden. Well...i've got Korrie, and the kids, and i count my blessings every night. The farm will come in time, meanwhile i dream (usually during the diaper changes:-)